The miners involved in the recent Compostela valley landslide were interviewed after the incident and in this they expressed their intention of returning to their work as soon as their body permits it. It was not courage on their faces, in fact, fear and trauma still lingered in their eyes. And yet, there they were on national television, discreetly protesting against the government’s initiative of closing down the mines to avoid anymore mishaps. It was not courage on their faces. It was desperation.
And here I am sitting comfortably on the couch in my own home, complaining about all the problems I have in life. It’s only Monday and I’m already thinking about what I’d do over the weekend, how I could escape the problems and conflicts living with us here in the house and how I can settle the demons down within me and “get away from it all.” I have always wondered how I got myself into the problems that I have now. I have always wanted to just run away from it all. I want to just sit back and relax, enjoy life while I’m still young. I don’t want any responsibilities yet. I want to go out, have some fun and not care what time I have to wake up tomorrow or if I have enough money for food and things like that.
These past few weeks, CDO was all over the news. I didn’t follow the entire story but from what I know, there was a flash flood that wiped out an entire town. I heard how a lot of people died, how a lot more are missing and how a lot more are homeless. A picture circulated around social networking sites that showed a grown man carrying a lifeless kid on his arms. Tears streaming down his face and he was just a picture of sadness and grief. I couldn’t take the picture, it was too sad for me. And so, I hid it from my newsfeed.
I realized how the people that survived got the bad part of the deal. They would have to suffer every waking moment of their traumatic experience and the fact that things would never be the same for them from here on end. I admired those people that had the strength to say that the show must go on for them. But as I looked into the eyes of these people, I realized that it is not courage that fuels their passion. I cannot tell for sure but I believe that what gets them going is the fact that they have to move on if they don’t want to just die with all the things running inside their heads, all the nightmares they’d have about their experience. They realize that if they don’t adapt, they won’t survive.
And here I am still waiting for a brilliant idea for this weekend. I have my own share of problems, heck I even want to run away from my own house if only I had the means to live by myself. I have always contemplated about the problems my family is facing and I have always come to the conclusion that I am sick and tired of all of it. I just can’t wait for graduation when I get my own money and I’d have the chance to save up and leave this draining place.
I know the world has problems and I’m pretty sure that my ranting and complaining is insignificant to a person who barely survived the collapse of the place he was mining or to a person who lost his entire family in the flood but like these people I couldn’t help but wish for a better life. We all have problems. Somehow we all are stuck in some kind of rut that we’re trying to get out of. I feel pretty guilty that I rant and complain about my life when it’s surely not as bad as the lives of other people. I honestly don’t know how I can change the lives of others when I’m already having a hard enough time changing my own. These people and I have one thing in common though, it surely is not courage that keeps me moving forward but despair and the desire to find an escape from my problems
